CAN YOU SAY “NO”?

Saying no is difficult. Most of us want to be helpful and please others. Some of us are so sensitive that we say yes to phone solicitations, and to requests from others, just to avoid disappointing somebody, however, part of finding a spot on the cosmic dance floor is standing our ground.

I know this sounds harsh, but often ‘no’  is the kindest word to say for all concerned. Buying a candy bar, which you may not want, or agreeing to serve on one more committee, when you are already on three other committees, may seem kind at that moment, but if you are trying to cut back on sugar or simplify your life, it’s best to say no.

(‘’Just say no” by NANCY REAGAN from the book “Questions from your Cosmic Dance” by John Coleman)

Some thoughts to consider:-

• Listen carefully to the request. Ask questions if it is not clear. Know that you don’t have to agree immediately, unless it is a crisis.

• Consider, and share alternatives if you do not feel able to help. e.g. “Why don’t you ask Joe, he has the necessary plumbing skills”.

• You do not have to agree to every request, but can sensitively listen and decline, if necessary. You are showing your care by listening and giving helpful advice or, honestly admitting that is out of your capability.

• It would be a caring gesture to contact the person who requested help a few days later, to see if they were able to solve their problem.